Hello. My name is Charlie Lyne. I used to write for Platform in ‘the early years’ but haven’t done much lately. I wrote a prose piece about Transport for London the other week but most people didn’t get it so I’m going ‘back to my roots’ (read: overuse of graphs, quote marks and ‘read:’).

This week, I started my foundation course at Chelsea Art School. We hadn’t had much work to do over the summer but we had had to upload a photo of a section of our bedroom to the Foundation Flickr group (how 2009 is that?) by way of introducing ourselves. This is the picture I went with:

Here’s that picture again with a visual guide to all the things about it that make me extremely cool:

I don’t think I should have put so much effort in to be honest because as soon as I got there I realised that all the coolest people hadn’t even bothered with the photo. They were probably too busy smoking drugs and watching pirated copies of District 9.

Today we all watched Chris Marker’s 1962 still montage classic La Jetée (it was the second time for me, obviously) in Visual Communication class and then created our own visual narratives in response. Here’s part of mine:

Evocative, I think you’ll agree. Just wait until you see the finished sequence.

I’ll try to keep you updated on my art school exploits, that is unless the whole thing becomes so unbearably tedious and mundane that reading about it threatens to send you into a downward spiral of regret and depression. Basically, it’ll be like London Kicks.

In the second paragraph of this page, I used the word ‘had’ twice in a row. If you’d like to make some money, bet someone that you can use the word ‘had’ eleven times in a row and still complete a grammatically accurate sentence.

Here’s the sentence:

John where Jane had had had had had had had had had had had the teacher’s approval.

And here it is again with some punctuation:

John, where Jane had had ‘had’, had had ‘had had’; ‘had had’ had had the teacher’s approval.

Go forth and spread the word.