Is it a crime to take a pregnancy test now? Does checking if you’re pregnant deem you an unsuitable role-model for young people? Are the X-factor bosses secretly roman-catholic? ‘We would have no problem with an X-factor baby, but none of the female members are married’.

So, a pregnancy test was found in the female contestants’ shared house. Whether the pregnancy test had been used or not has still not been revealed, but apparently the owner has come forward.

Maybe someone was just being generous and trying to have a baby to give to Britney Spears.

The X-factor bosses have gotten themselves in a right flap (excuse the pun) over this, and are supposedly willing to do absolutely anything to protect the show’s image.

Next year they should make clear that celibacy is considered a pre-requisite for the competitors, or at least provide them with some glittery chastity belts.

Pregnancy tests shouldn’t be a taboo in today’s culture; they’re not even the sort of thing that you would hide in a bathroom really, especially one in a house full of young women.

These out-dated views on conception make me worry that if the test shows positive, the ITV bosses will probably recommend that the contestant in question has a hot bath with some knitting needles in hand.

WORDS: BILLIE PORTER