Everyone loves Halloween, and every little kid enjoys the fun of collecting free candy from strangers whilst dressed in silly, innocent get-ups. Noah Cyrus is not one of those kids because Noah Cyrus is the 9 year old daughter of Billy Ray Cyrus, little sister to Miley and that emo guy who’s in that band and has more tattoos than muscle mass/dignity.

So that’s another one of the Cyrus clan we’re left to deal with. I personally enjoy seeing these kids cause a ruckus because they reflect everything that is wrong with Southern America. Besides, it’s fun watching someone else’s kids lose complete touch with reality since it makes you feel better about the spiral you’re going down (drugs, casual sex, useless ‘art’ degree). You can go home and show your mum that out there are kids that are far more fucked up than you, and they’ve essentially have no need to worry about your drinking problem.

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Here we have Noah, clad in knee-high-patent-heeled-leather-lace-up boots, and a purple and black piece of cloth a ’stylist’ has decided to cut off right above decency-length.

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That’s Noah again, re-applying some of that lipstick as it’s slowly fading ‘the night away’, there’s lots of celebrities’ kids at this event, I’m sure! Pucker-up Princess!

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This is Noah, dragging along one of her BFFs. There’s lots of perks to being in the Cyrus entourage, what they are I am not sure, but the grin on Little Devil’s face suggests really cool things. I’m guessing they’re not really into building forts out of bedsheets? LAME. These girls are WAY too cool for that.

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Here we have Noah once more with her bestie Emily Grace. I take it she’s dressed up as a bumblebee, adorable! And Noah’s costume is supposed to be Minnie Mouse, but I’m not sure because Minnie had puff sleeves, a huge bow ribbon, modest shoes, and kept the image of innocence for every little girl alive and well. Noah’s killed that innocence, she’s stomped on it with her boots!

So the problem with being a Cyrus isn’t the fame and having to deal with other sibling in the spotlight, it’s thinking that stuff like this is actually OK.